I have no purpose, no “point.”
I am doomed to fall, doomed to fail, repeatedly and hard, regardless of any earnest effort. Maybe because of my earnest effort.
I am alone.
I cannot love or be loved. Not the “right” way, whatever that even means.
Having a spiritual “family” is an impossible myth.
I have no courage; my “one word” for 2012 is a total joke.
I cannot step out like others so effortlessly do. Other Christians. Better Christians.
I am an inferior Christian. Deficient. Irrelevant.
I will never amount to anything, because I never have amounted to anything.
I should quit church and community, friends and family. It’s not worth it.
Should just lock myself up forever. Away from everyone.
I am a freaking hopeless mess.
Still reeling from the sheer, overwhelming magnitude of my 25th birthday. Thankfully, I find myself immediately immersed in a much-needed vacation to sort out my soul.
Also happening soon, my half-marathon this Sunday. Good thing I’m a new man with new legs now.
More pictures, video, and/or holograms from my momentous night to come next week. Be back to blogging again in no time.
I love you all.